


I Like My Coffee Dark

by Spuri



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Coffee, Crack, Derek is surprisingly perceptive, Fluff, M/M, One Shot, Pre-Slash, kind of, stiles is a dork
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-05
Updated: 2013-05-05
Packaged: 2017-12-10 11:14:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,210
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/785424
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spuri/pseuds/Spuri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So Stiles has a favourite brand of coffee, sue him. It's not like it's any of Derek's business what he drinks.</p><p>He wonders when Derek got to know him well enough to pick up on this stuff, though.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Like My Coffee Dark

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to the lovely Nira, who was kind enough to let me know about this brand of coffee, thus sparking (hah) this story. Visual proof that coffee exists below.
> 
> Rated for language, pretty much.

 

“Dark Spark. Really, Stiles?” Derek picked up the opened bag of coffee Stiles left on the counter as he started the coffee maker, and Stiles could pretty much _hear_ the raised eyebrow, without even having to turn and look to confirm. Derek’s eyebrows were like that, they had this... presence. They were the loudest eyebrows Stiles had ever seen. Heard. Whatever.

“Zip it, furball, or I’m lacing your cup with mountain ash, don’t think I won’t,” he snapped, and Derek laughed at him. Well, kind of snorted, but it was a laughing snort. Stiles was sort of torn between feeling proud that he’d managed to squeeze amusement out of the seemingly perpetual lump of emo brooding that was Derek Hale, and feeling indignant that the stupid wolf clearly wasn’t taking the threat seriously. As if _Stiles_ was too _pathetic_ to ever manage to harm him, or something. Bastard werewolf.

...okay, maybe he was projecting.

Staring at the coffee maker wouldn’t make it go any faster, so he turned back to Derek. “So, what magical wonder of a fairy tale gone wrong was it you wanted me to research this time?”

Derek fixed him with a considering look, then glanced back down at the bag of coffee he was still holding. “This is your theme song. But in coffee form.”

Stiles bit down the instinctual urge to deny, because Derek and his stupid wolfy ears would hear the lie for what it was, and damn it, when had he gotten so damn _perceptive_? No one else had caught on to Stiles switching coffee brands, or realized that he tended to grin when he made coffee at home now. Or how he’d snicker at his shopping cart like a crazy person whenever he went to get more.

Sure, it had taken a little while to get used to the kind of... intense flavour compared to what he’d been drinking before, but the comic value alone was worth it. Plus, a small part of him - a itsy, bitsy tiny part, okay, don’t judge - liked the thought of being Dark Spark, a superhero from one of the grittier comics he’d read, or something. It was... comforting, to come home after having his ass handed to him by the weekly monster and brew some damn coffee and sit perfectly still so he wouldn’t upset any aches, and just... pretend. For a little while.

A smirk spread on Derek’s face, and damn it, Stiles’ heart or whatever must have betrayed him anyway, even though he’d said no damning words. He briefly fantasized about Derek asking Stiles to cut off his stupid, unfair _ears_ , something he’d be way more interested in than traumatizing arm cutting off-ing. Seriously, the heartbeat thing was unfair, it was like playing human interaction with a cheat sheet.

Admittedly, Derek needed all the help he could get on that front, but still. Totally unfair.

“You drink this. Feeling _outrageously bold_ ,” Derek said, quoting the coffee’s tagline. He was still smirking gleefully. Stiles much suspected that this was Derek’s version of what would, on a normal person, be a ‘Christmas come early’ grin. Like he’d found the fucking holy grail of mocking.

“Shut up,” Stiles got out through gritted teeth, trying his best to ignore how overheated his face felt. He opened a cupboard to get them cups, but mostly to have something between his probably bright red face and Derek’s all to perceptive looks. “Forget mountain ash, you’re getting _wolfsbane_ in yours, I swear.” 

He brightened slightly when his eyes landed on the ugliest cup in existence. It was covered in bright, garish flowers. It had a _kitten_. A slightly demented-looking kitten, because somehow, the paint job on this cup had been screwed up. It was glorious. It was the perfect revenge. He grabbed it, and a perfectly normal blue coffee cup for himself, and poured them both the now finished coffee.

Stiles shoved the ugly kitten cup at Derek and tried his best not to smile smugly. He wasn’t entirely sure how successful his attempt was. Derek just stared at the cup, then up at Stiles.

Stiles took a sip of his own coffee to hide a smile. Hah, now his cup was contaminated, and Derek would have no choice but to use the kitten cup. He pushed the cup at Derek’s chest, hoping it would prod him into action and just take the damn thing already.

It didn’t.

“Dude, I’m letting go of this cup in five seconds, and if you’re not holding it, you’ll have painfully hot coffee all over yourself, and I’m making you pick up the pieces and mop the floor. Fair warning.”

Derek growled slightly, but grabbed the cup, and sipped. He made a thoughtful sound. “At least your theme song coffee is good. If you’d made me drink sub-par coffee because you’re a dork, I would’ve slammed your head on the counter.”

Stiles glared at him. “Shut up about my coffee, it’s none of your business.” He was pretty sure Derek wouldn’t _actually_ have slammed his head against the counter. Probably. Their entire relationship was pretty much based on mutual empty threats.

Derek shrugged and took another sip. If Stiles didn’t know better, he’d say Derek looked _pleased_. As if he found Stiles’ silly coffee tasty, or something. Which was stupid.

“It suits you,” Derek said, with an expression even Stiles - who had spent a _lot_ of time trying to figure out The Various Expressions Of Derek Hale - couldn’t place. “It’s... cute.”

Stiles’ brain short-circuited. He was pretty sure it had _never_ been this quiet in his head before. He gaped at Derek, who just smirked, and left the kitchen, probably heading back up to Stiles’ room and the awaiting research.

“Did you just-... Derek? _Derek_?!” Stiles called, and pretty much ran after him to catch up. “Was that flir-! Oh my _god_ , what is even my life?!”

“We’ve got research to do,” Derek said casually, as if he hadn’t just turned everything Stiles knew about the world on its head. Seriously, he’d never thought he’d hear the word _cute_ from Derek’s mouth. And that had sounded suspiciously like _flirting_. Seriously, was Derek flirting with him? Was this a thing that happened now?

“Don’t ignore me, you ass, what the hell was-... Seriously, Derek!”

“Research. Focus.”

They had reached Stiles’ room, and Derek pushed him towards his computer chair. It was surprisingly gentle, as pushing from Derek went. Stiles whined. “You are confusing, and I hate you.”

“I’m sure that The Dark Spark can rise above it. Drink your coffee.” As if to lead by example, Derek drank more of his, completely unconcerned about Stiles’ melting brain.

“So. Much. Hate,” Stiles grumbled, but he took a big gulp of coffee and turned to his computer. There would be no answers from Derek when he was in Stubbornly Mysterious Mode. So he filed the mystery of Possibly Flirting Derek in the back of his head to pick at later. Oh, there would be so much picking. “So, what are we researching today?”

So Derek told him about the possible zombie vampires, and if research took a _little_ bit longer than usual because Stiles kept getting distracted by Derek’s warm presence next to him, nobody had to know.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm also on [tumblr](http://spurisani.tumblr.com/), where this originated. Feel free to poke me, I don't bite.
> 
> Or, well, at least my bite doesn't turn people into werewolves?
> 
> Also, cookies to anyone who figures out what supernatural creature they're looking for, from Derek's hilariously uninformative description.
> 
> (...Anyone know why I can't seem to get a capital letter for the "Stiles is a dork" tag, by the way?)


End file.
